


Always Starts the Same

by Chantress



Series: And Yet Here We Are [4]
Category: The Witcher (TV)
Genre: Crack Treated Seriously, Dialogue-Only, Gratuitous Abuse of Elder Speech, Innuendo, Multi, Trolling, Yennefer and Jaskier's Relationship Status Is “In Cahoots With”, banter as foreplay, basically Mornington Crescent but with naughty bits, implied figging
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-29
Updated: 2020-01-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:22:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22457161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chantress/pseuds/Chantress
Summary: Yennefer and Jaskier like to play games at Geralt's expense. Somehow Geralt always ends up winning.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg
Series: And Yet Here We Are [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1614133
Comments: 12
Kudos: 225





	Always Starts the Same

**Author's Note:**

> Credit goes to [BabelGhoti](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BabelGhoti), [carboncopies](https://archiveofourown.org/users/carboncopies), and [sylvaine](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sylvaine) for most of the sex acts mentioned in this fic; any remaining perversion is entirely my own. <3

"So, Yen, what do you say to a bit of the old Cintran Gambit this evening?"  
  
"Absolutely not; my back _still_ hurts from last time. What about King Foltest's Frolic instead?"  
  
"Where would we find a goat and enough marmalade at this hour? No, it had better be the Stuffing of the Unicorn."  
  
"Jaskier, just what kind of lady do you take me for?"  
  
"All right, _you_ suggest something, then."  
  
" _Glean Gloir aen Gwynbleidd_."  
  
"Something different from what we usually do, I meant. ...Say, it _has_ been a while since we tried Melitele's Melon Lolly. Together, I mean."  
  
"Somehow, I never end up enjoying that as much as you and Geralt seem to. Up, Down, and All Around?"  
  
"We'd need at least three more people for that one. And I don't much care for heights. Crossing to Skellige?"  
  
"The innkeeper would never forgive us for the stains. Or the noise. The Nilfgaardian Tumbleweed?"  
  
"I am _not_ dressing up in that costume again! But if you're really in the mood for that sort of thing, we could always--"  
  
"Fuck it, you two. We're doing the Zerrikanian Fire Scorpion."  
  
"Uh. That's... not a real position. ...Is it?"  
  
"Of course it is. Jaskier, sit on my chest and give me your knees. Yen, fetch us a blindfold... and some ginger."  
  
***  
  
"...Can we just... fuck next time? And not do anything complicated?"  
  
"I thought you'd enjoyed yourself, Jaskier."  
  
"Well, I mean _obviously_ I did. _Obviously_. But... gahhhhhhhhhh."  
  
"Usually it doesn't take so long to make you this speechless. I must be losing my touch."  
  
" _Gahhhhhhhhhhhhhh_..."  
  
"Geralt, don't torment our poor bard. Any more than you already have, I mean."  
  
"Hmm."  
  
"And wipe that smug expression off your face."  
  
"I won the game, didn't I?"  
  
"That doesn't mean you have to gloat about it."  
  
" _Hmm_."  
  
"Just for that, we're doing the Golden Oriole next time. Jaskier, we'll need to get extra lube tomorrow. And find a sturdier bed."  
  
" _Gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh_."

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[podfic] Always Starts The Same](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23365315) by [Gondolinpod (Gondolin)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gondolin/pseuds/Gondolinpod), [olive2pod (olive2read)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/olive2read/pseuds/olive2pod), [thriceandonce (sylvaine)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sylvaine/pseuds/thriceandonce)




End file.
